nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
