We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Randomize
