So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
