You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
