I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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