office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
