two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
