Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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