So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
