it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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