You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
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