I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
