we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
