I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
