After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize