I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
