Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
