I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
My vagina is officially offended.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
