im gay
i know
yea but for you.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
