READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
