I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
