I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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