4 words: hood of his car
that's an acceptable place to lick
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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