btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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