i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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