i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
