i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I'm gonna fight the coyote
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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