I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
