i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
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