Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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