It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
