i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Randomize
