Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
hell yes lets make some ravioli
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
