Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
