I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Last time i carry you out of a forest
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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