i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
