I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
