my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize