why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
