I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
farters have to be the big spoon...
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
