We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
