drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
It was like getting head from an anaconda
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Randomize
