Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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