that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
