Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
