So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
