Dual....:-)
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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