I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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