It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
