I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize
