i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
